Unedited
Last night on twitter my feed was full of "highschool starter packs" which of course there was. What else do a bunch of mid 20-30 something’s have to do on Monday night. I, of course, wanted to join in, because what else do I a mid 20 something have to do on a Monday night. Unfortunatley, I have no idea who I was in highschool, I got as far as the first picture (a pair of flimsy grey vans) and blanked. Sure, yeah, there were things about me I could’ve added, bands I’d liked, clothes I liked, books, etc. We’ve all been teenagers; but I just could not pick 4 things that made sense as "me".
This is all to say I have always had an issue with identity. This is probably deep rooted in something and should probably talk to someone more qualified than this screen, but that's something to deal with another day. I'm learning, right now, at the age of 24, that it does not matter "who I am" or what "defines" me.
1. No one cares
2. If I'm doing things that make me feel fulfilled in some sense then I don't care either
Its funny to think I have a shitty tattoo that is meant to remind me of this (in reality I put meaning to something I wanted to get tattooed at 18) but 6 years later I'm still trying to remember this thing. This thing that seems simple but I've spent so long trying to do the exact opposite that I inherently now don't feel like I am anything.
So, in the spirit of rebuilding. I am Corrin. I read my own name as Comin more often than not. I really like books. Nevertheless and albeit are the best words in the english language as dubbed by me and my creative writing degree. Tv shows are better than movies. Most "good" movies are ok at best. I don't like the movie hereditary. I am a good writer. My friends are perfect people. Cats are my favorite animal hands down. I am very good at thinking. I refuse to learn the concept of moving on. I'm in LOVE love. Papaya and redbean/taro smoothies with tapioca are S tier. Warm neutral palette is my go to.Followed by a cool dusky palette. I love interior design. I am VERY good at learning. I think anime is a superior artform. And there is nothing I want more than a circle saw.
These are things I like about myself and things that feel like me. In an act of self love I will not read this list back to myself because it will change and I will change and that is good and I am happy to be this person now and someone else later. It’s ok and good to live many lives within the one you are given.
